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'Funny' times with Cpap (Sort Of?)
There I was on holiday with the family (Wife and two young'ish Step-Daughters) in a Caravan in the middle of summer, it was hot and all the Caravan's windows were open, we were on a campsite that had a rather large 'Social Club'.
We got back to the Caravan about 1am 'slightly worse for wear' (Read this as tired and slightly intoxicated).
Being a bit of a 'Planner' my Cpap was set up ready to go on the bedside table (It was a BIG Caravan with two bedrooms). The girls and my wife had already gone to bed, all I had to do was lock up the Caravan and go to bed, but I fancied another drink. Several rather large drinks later I 'Staggered' off to bed.
I was very quiet and got into bed, I put on a Nasal Pillows mask and started the Cpap machine (I didn't use Ramp and a full 15cmh20 pressure kicked in).
Something was very wrong as I had something (That seemed to be alive?) jammed firmly in my left nostril. (It's obvious now that a Wasp looking for a place to sleep thought my Nasal Pillows mask was a good bed for the night!).
I jumped out of bed sending the Cpap machine crashing to the floor, I must confess I must have looked a bit odd as there I was in the 'Buff' staggering around the bedroom with a Cpap machine swinging like something from 'The Pit and the Pendulum'.
I had woken everybody up in my panic and the girls were now heading for the bedroom, I grabbed at the only item of clothing I could and to my horror realised as the light went on (The Girls again) that you cannot cover much with one of my wifes slipper's, by this time my wife was in utter hysterics an I still had the damn wasp jammed up my left nostril. Realising there wasn't any danger the girls joined my wife on the bed and all three were in fits of laughter at the naked vista that unfolded in front of them.
I removed the machine and quickly covered up and headed of to the 'On Suite bathroom' (It really was a big Caravan!) to try and remove the damn wasp, which was now probably a bit 'miffed' at all the commotion. I inhaled through my mouth and closed my right nostril with my finger, and tried to breathe out and expel the wasp. After two attempts it worked and it flew straight out the window probably to annoy somebody else.
I put on a dressing gown and returned to the bedroom, only to find all three in complete hysterics on the bed.
Evidentially in my haste I was standing there in my wifes pink fluffy dressing gown and my wife had told the girls that when she got up later that day, she would throw away one of her pink fluffy slippers as well!
These days I always leave the room when the subject of wasp's or Pink slipper is broached (Can you blame me?)
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DielaughingLaugh-a-lotBig Grin

Very funny Podd

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Great story!

You're lucky that it didn't end up like my encounter with some kind of black hornets a couple of Saturdays ago. I got stung 4 times and had to be taken off to the hospital by ambulance in a full Anaphylaxis! Imagine arriving in emergency wearing only a pink slipper as a fig leaf!
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Hey there Podd, That's (sort of,) a very funny story, (Ha-Ha-Ha-Ha-Ha,) thanks for sharing it, (Ha-Ha-Ha-Ha.) That kind of brings new meaning to the phrase feeling no pain, HUH? Seriously, hope you're okay after your experience.
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Heck, I hope the kids are okay! They're scarred for life! The image of the nightgown on you has been burned into their retinas!
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Breathe deeply and count to zen.


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I've got to thank you for this story! Definitely trumps every other CPAP story I've ever read on this board. It made me laugh out loud at work, so I've shared it with all my coworkers and you've spread a great amount of joy.
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Thanks for the laugh Podd. Brought back painful memories! When I was around 11 years old I ended up in the middle of a KOA campground (a very busy campground I might add) in nothing but what I was born with. Something about pulling up ones shorts only to discover a scorpion had made a home in the crotch while one is sleeping will tend to make one go in one direction and the shorts in another! LOL! Creepy feeling I would rather not repeat....running starkers through a campground is not something I wish to repeat either!
As always, YMMV! You do not have to agree or disagree, I am not a professional so my mental meanderings are simply recollections of things from my own life.

PRS1 - Auto - A-Flex x2 - 12.50 - 20 - Humid x2 - Swift FX
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Lol...you guys are just too fuuny. Here it is at 1215, I have been to bed 3 times already.....with no sleep in site. Somehow, I just know that my next trip to bed will result in a "crack up" that only me and my dog will think is funny. My dog, Ginny is on the floor beside me looking at me like I am totally weird, laughing my head off!!!
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Hilarious! Thanks for sharing it! Dielaughing
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Slightly off topic here but I was always really careful around the girls as their 'natural' father was still a big part of their lives.
We were in my car driving down a Motorway and a car changed lanes almost sideswiping us, well my 'Stress' Tourettes'' kicked in and I shouted 'W**ker'. Straight away the girls asked what was a 'Wan**r' was, realising this was a serious 'Faux Pas'.
I told the girls that I was very sorry for swearing in front of them and I would be in a lot of trouble if their mum knew I swore in front of them, I said it was a very bad word and they must not ever repeat it again, they said they would never ever say the word again. A couple of days later we were out in my wifes car and we were driving along and all thought of the episode in my car were forgotten, then a car pulled out of a side street and we almost collided with the other car, I just knew I was going to be in deep DoooDoo's as the eldest Step daughter said "WAN" and then her sister said "KER" this they repeated several times. My wife who was driving said "I am going to have a word with your father, teaching you language like that", I kept quiet, can you blame me?
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