We've all given advice but you have yet to respond to any of it. No matter what any of us say, you don't seem willing to respond in a way that encourages more positive advice. It is as if you are screaming you are on fire so we hand you a bucket of water. But instead of pouring it on yourself, you throw it back at us.
(09-23-2012 08:38 PM)Nancy Wrote: Gosh you guys are right. My lack of sleep is all about me. GEE! Why didn't IIIIIII think of that. So I am pissed and awake. Just go to another room? The couch or my kids' room? Yep I will be OK cause it's my problem. I thought this board was to vent, applaud, or exchange info. Seriously I am the only wife who's had an issue? Someone else try to run a household on less than 5 hours of interrupted sleep and see how graciously they respond to this new intrusion in their life.
This is what we mean by you seeming to only thinking of yourself. Shall I start a poll to ask how many of us have actually had less than 5 hrs of sleep for years? We welcome the intrusion of the CPAP because it gives us our life back. Oddly enough, nearly all of our partners welcome the intrusion, too.
Quote:Remember I encouraged this, now it is a chasm between my normally congenial mood and this new one. He'll sleep great because I am the one making sure he gets it. Thanks for the vote of confidence. Somehow I managed to raise 8 children (3 still at home), but now getting a goodnight's sleep is my problem.
Again with the martyrdom. On the one hand, I'm glad you cared enough about your husband to make him seek help. On the other hand, when you sought help for yourself, all you have done is get mad at any advice we offer.
Quote:Maybe, just maybe if I slept just one night through this past week I might not be so defensive. Maybe waking up to an errie green glow in the room and the sight of this new alien being lying beside with all of his out-of-earth accouterments; his mask askew might be less evasive if I were getting enough sleep too. All we need here is the Twillight Zone's theme song and Rod sterling's voice over..."Only in the Twillight Zone" Yes I agree it is a communication problem. That is why I came here on this forum instead of going to him. I thought I might get a "chin up, it will get better" from another spouse who's "been there done that".
Here's some advice: cover the top of the machine with a small hand towel. It will block the light. When his mask isn't right, wake him up and make him fix it. Tell him what you are thinking and how you are feeling. Try to work through the issues. If you still can't work through them, make him go to the couch while you get the bed.
There, another bucket to help you put out your fire.
Your posts come across as bitter and angry. You say you are bitter and angry. What do you want us to do? Give you permission to tell him to stop using it? Give you permission to get divorced?
Nearly all of us that have responded to this thread have given you good advice. Have you tried any of it? Are you even willing to try any of it?
Only one other member has said anything even slightly negative as to what they and their bed partners did to solve the issue. Yet your only response is to yet again vent your spleen at us.
Most of the spouses that come here, come to ask advice on how to help their bed partner. Nearly all of us that have a partner have managed to work around the issues. Most of our partners are willing to work around the issues because they would rather see us healthy and not snoring. My partner willingly tolerated the CPAP because it was quieter than the snoring. The sound of air was better than the windows rattling.