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Nightmare night............!
#1
Just to show newbies that even long time users of CPAP can have nightmare nights.

I went to sleep after tightening my chin strap as I had an angry RED face looking at me from my machine the other morning.
So I tightened it a little and went to bed, it turned out that although it was fine when I went to bed it appeared to tighten through the night.
I woke up feeling like my chin was being pulled through my head, of course I didn't fully waken, just enough to say a few naughty words as i pulled it forward on my head to loosen it slightly.  Still a bit thigh, but I was wanting to go back to sleep as I was to lazy to sit up and adjust it properly, plus I thought I would disturb my sleeping partner.  I remember thinking she was making a right noise snoring and that she is getting worse, however, that is another story!
So I adjusted it a bit and tried to get back to sleep.  Next thing I felt was the mask getting tugged off my head "what the?" I though to myself as there was no one else to listen as she was sleeping.  So in a vain attempt to sort things out quickly I rugged the chin strap down and just left it.  I have not had a lot of sleep lately due to a gastric bug that has not quite left me yet, so I was in no mood to mess about.  I pulled the mask up thinking I could just go back to sleep with the chin strap just hanging around the headgear somewhere.  I went to sleep and the next thing I know was the nasal pillows I use had jumped up my face!  I had no idea why, they have never done this before, none of the ones I have ever used.  So I spent the next five minutes trying to work out what was going on, however, I managed to get them to go back into place and went back to sleep again, quite pleased with myself that I had done this while still half asleep.  I did wonder what had happened to the chin strap that was somewhere in the head gear, but as it didn't appear to be causing a problem I just decided to leave it as everything appeared to be fine now.
Forward an hour of so, I got a dig in the ribs and told "Will you turn that light off?"  "Eh!  What light" I thought to myself?  Then through the haze of half closed eyes I saw a bright white light.  I tried to open my eyes a bit further, but they refused to open, then this voice said again "Will you turn that light off?"
I opened my eyes again to see there was indeed a bright white light and it was coming from my dresser table at the side of the bed.
I don't know what I was thinking about but I remember thinking "Why is someone shining a light into my eyes?"
Then I woke up fully, looked at the sourse of the light, it was my ResMed Airsense10 Autoset that the light was coming from, what's more it was coming from the screen and there was writing on the screen.  What was worse was the machine had stopped and was sitting doing nothing with the screen all lit up!  My headgear I think was half on and half off my head, so I took it off, tried to look at the print on the screen, but I couldn't get my eyes to focus looking into the bright light, so I have no idea what it said, maybe "Wake up dopey, your headgear has come off and I am pumping air at the room" I have still no idea what it said, but I heard this voice coming from the darkness "Will you turn that light off?"
Girr, has no one any patience these days?
Anyway, I found the chin strap and threw it away, put on my headgear that had now fallen into the dark abbyss of the bedroom floor.
After fishing about in the semi-dark (the light from the machine although it appeared bright didn't help to find the headgear) but this voice kept saying, "What are you doing, turn the light off" to my annoyance.
If it had been a male voice I would have blamed Walla Walla, but as it was female it had to be the missis, or am I dreaming and could it be someone else "Me dreaming now!" Laugh-a-lotAnyway, after a bit of fumbling around I found the mask and the headgear, lifted it up, just to find it was stuck on something.  What could it possibly get caught on, there is nothing there but the floor and the mask!  How wrong could I be, I had thrown the chin strap away in disgust, it had hooked onto the mask and hose when it fell and was now holding into it for life or death, could I work out what it was holding onto?  I gave a huge tug and there was this rasping noise of Velcro ripping apart and the mask and headgear came shooting up and hit me in the face.  Well now I was annoyed and this voice said again "Will you turn the light off?"
Oh, if she says that one more time they will need the riot squad here to sort the carnage out.
I gave my sore nose and face a run as it now felt I had been through a round with Mohammad Ali.
I put on the headgear and nasal pillows and took a breath, to my relief I heard the machine start up with a quiet whine and the light went dimmer and I could see through my bruised eyes the display on the machine starting to climb up from 2 to 10 and up, but the light went out before I could tell what pressure it went up to (It is so annoying the light cut out so quickly, but I suppose they can't cater for everyone) but at least I thought there would be one person in the room that would be pleased it went out!
Next thing I knew (around an hour later) was that air was finding a way out through the side of my mouth as I didn't have the chin strap on.
It had just started like a tap (faucet) dripping air into my mouth, but it was enough to wake me.  I tried getting some moisture into my mouth as that will stop it for a while, but nothing was coming, so I thought of chocolate, but still nothing, so I thought of Rhubarb Crumble, now that is enough to get the juices flowing I thought, but no!  So in frustration, I took a sip of the water that I kept in a bottle by the side of the bed (keep in mind I had been ill with some gastric bug) the water had not been changed and was rank, two weeks old! It made me gag at the stale rancid taste, I sat up in bed,  Threw my mask and headgear off and was  ready to make a dash for the toilet "What now?" came the voice from the dark!
The gagging effect over and the water swallowed I could do nothing about it, so I went back into bed, which was followed by sighs from this voice in the dark.  I went back into the bed, leaned over to pick up the mask and headgear up, it was stuck to the floor again.  Why, was it stuck, there is nothing there but carpet.  I rugged it and then came the ripping noise of Velcro again, I could understand why it was sticking to the floor with Velcro as it was all facing into the mask and not sticking out to stick to anything, if it had been I would stick to the bedding or something.  Anyway, i lost interest as this voice started up again "Will you go to sleep?"  I thought there was going to be a murder again in these quiet parts.
I got the headgear on and the mask fitted well enough to try to get some sleep again, and along with a few sighs from the other side of the bed I went to sleep.
I woke up shortly afterwards to the sound of air escaping from somewhere, I adjusted the mask to get the air stopped and went back to sleep.
Next thing I knew was this gushing sound of air, I adjusted the mask and it made not a blind bit of difference, so I went to curse out loud, when I did the noise stopped.  What, why did it stop? (yes you are all ahead of me, but then you are fully awake which I was not at the time) the air was escaping out of my mouth, my mouth had opened when I turned onto my back and the air was gushing out!  I gave out a sigh of frustration, and all I got was this voice out of the dark from the other side saying "What now?"
There was no earthly way was I drinking any of that foul water I had taken a mouthful of earlier, so I got up and went for a drink after pressing the machines iff button on top.
While I was away I heard this loud hissing noise start up.  I knew exactly what it was, the machine that is set to start automatically when I start to breath had started to deliver air and it was howling out at full tilt making this very loud hissing howling noise!
I gulped some water and rushed back,  The voice from the dark side said "£^%$%"^*" as I got to the machine and pressed the button.
"What the $*&%^$ are you doing?" said the voice from the dark side.
I didn't say anything except "Having a fantastic night with Ape nea ah"
"What, with what, who?" said the dark side voice.
"Never ind I said, the light is going out in a second" i said as I put on the mask for what appeared the hundredth time tonight.
I stuck it on and adjusted it as best as I could and tried to get to sleep, but it was pointless, her alarm went off just as I was finally starting to doze off.
Why does she have the alarm set for 5:30am when she does not go to work or 8am, she is not supposed to start until 9am, sometimes she is away at 7:30am to start at 9am.  We are only a mile away, so at that time of morning it only takes 10 minutes to get there!
Anyway, I thought I would try to get some sleep after she got up, but no, every 15 minutes another alarm went off.
Finally at 7:15 she got up and then said after pushing me to make extra sure I was awake "You have an appointment today, time you were up and had a shower"   Oh-jeez

For the first time the container for the water was almost empty in the machine!
Never been close before on this machine, just shows how a leak can use some water.
Anyway, I got up to find the shower occupied by herself, so I went back to look at the angry red face of the machine "You can shut up as well" I said to it as i hit the power switch.
At that point I heard the bathroom door open so I rushed to have a shower but as I got to it my darling sleeping partner (the missis) said "To late, Christopher is away in".
Shock  Why does it always happen to me?

I went back to bed and the world can just wait for me today.
I fell asleep for a couple of minutes.  Oh it was a nice snooze, but it ended abruptly when a wet towel landed on my face "You have an appointment today remember, you can't afford to be late".
To think this all started when I went to bed to get a good sleep, well what happened to that?   Dont-know

What did the machine say anyway?   Thinking-about

I never did find out, but it had shut down by itself.   Rolleyes

I need a   Coffee

This might need to be shifted.

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#2
I feel like I need my bed!   Rolleyes

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#3
That was epic...I'm sorry for your terrible night. But it was a very amusing read!
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#4
Crazy
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#5
It is the voice from the dark side that is a bit strange!   Dielaughing

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#6
Too-funny

OMG, what a night! Thanks for the laugh!
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