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Sleeping with someone who uses CPAP
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pgw78 Offline

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Post: #1
Sleeping with someone who uses CPAP
I'm single. I'm wondering: those of you who have someone else in bed, does CPAP disturb your partner? There's the noise of the machine. And the flow of air coming out of the vent in the mask. And the tubing. And the mask itself. How do you and your partner deal with all that?
07-18-2013 07:16 PM
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Tez62 Offline

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Sex: Male
Location: Melbourne, Australia

Post: #2
RE: Sleeping with someone who uses CPAP
pgw78, your probably going to get a huge amount of different thoughts on this one, in my case I moved into a different bedroon before being diagnosed as I couldn't sleep and would always be waking my wife by tossing and turning and I have PLMD period limb movement disorder which makes me kick my legs and throw my arms around and my body can jump off the bed so it wasn't very good for her. Since being diagnosed I get a fantastic nights sleep but my wife hates the thought of seeing me with a mask on and all the things you mentioned, so I made the decision that my life is much more importamt than sleeping next to my wife and me suffering and potentail dying. It's a personal decision but if our husbands / wifes / partners can't accept it, in my case there was only one option and the decision was fairly easy.
07-18-2013 07:24 PM
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PaulaO2 Offline
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Posts: 5,995
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Machine: S9 Autoset
Mask Type: Nasal pillows
Mask Make & Model: Nuance (non-pro)
Humidifier: H5i
CPAP Pressure: 14-20
CPAP Software: SleepyHead

Other Comments: Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome

Sex: Undisclosed
Location: western NC, USA

Post: #3
RE: Sleeping with someone who uses CPAP
My partner could care less about the machine's capabilities. She cares more about the noise it makes. The loves the S9 as the S7 was louder and the light on the top never turned off. I kept a towel over it.

She could also care less about how I look with the mask on. She knows it means I am quiet and she can sleep! She does tell me if a mask is too noisy, meaning the air from the vent hole(s). One in particular she actually woke me up a few hours after I went to sleep and said she couldn't take it any longer. I switched back to an old one. She's learned over the years what the noises are. Like it is off my face vs the vent air hitting the pillow.

In other words, we communicate. She tells me what is bothering her and I see what can be done to fix it. A towel over the light, a feather pillow so it doesn't rise up like fluff-filled pillows do, etc.

Tez62, I'm really sorry your wife feels that way. That how you look would make that much of a difference to her since you both would be asleep most of the night. I'll make a voodoo doll of her and keep her awake at night.

pgw78, my suggestion is this: if your potential partner does not like the looks of the mask or the idea of the devices, then get another. Your life and quality of sleep is worth so much more than that.

PaulaO2
Apnea Board Moderator
www.ApneaBoard.com


Breathe deeply and count to zen.

INFORMATION ON APNEA BOARD FORUMS OR ON APNEABOARD.COM SHOULD NOT BE CONSIDERED AS MEDICAL ADVICE. ALWAYS SEEK THE ADVICE OF A PHYSICIAN BEFORE SEEKING TREATMENT FOR MEDICAL CONDITIONS, INCLUDING SLEEP APNEA. INFORMATION POSTED ON THE APNEA BOARD WEB SITE AND FORUMS ARE PERSONAL OPINION ONLY AND NOT NECESSARILY A STATEMENT OF FACT.
07-18-2013 07:39 PM
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Tez62 Offline

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Posts: 641
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Machine: Resmed S9 Autoset
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Sex: Male
Location: Melbourne, Australia

Post: #4
RE: Sleeping with someone who uses CPAP
Thanks Paulao2, I'm fine with it, I love life now. Like you said were both asleep most of the night anyway Big Grin
(This post was last modified: 07-18-2013 07:46 PM by Tez62.)
07-18-2013 07:43 PM
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IloveZ Offline

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Posts: 4
Joined: Jul 2013

Machine: ResMed S9 Apap
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Post: #5
RE: Sleeping with someone who uses CPAP
My husband says the machine et all is much quieter than my snoring pre-PAP
07-18-2013 07:46 PM
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zonk Offline

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Machine: S9 AutoSet
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Other Comments: CPAP since Nov 2010

Sex: Male
Location: Australia

Post: #6
RE: Sleeping with someone who uses CPAP
I can understand the concern, there is time for everything, intimacy and put the mask on don,t mix Thinking-about
Once the mask is on, turn machine and go to sleep, we have a pillow between us, not to do with CPAP, just prevent me taking over all the bed and most of the time, I sleep facing the other way
My mask is so quiet, need to put my hand in front to feel the air coming out of the vents

I wear chinstrap over the mask, the chinstrap helps kep mask in place, so when get up during the night to pee, just un-clip the lower straps, disconnect the hose from mask and turn off machine. Place an old sock over the screen so the light don,t disturb my wife and have one those of light plug in the hallway and bathroom to see my way around without turning on ceiling lights
07-18-2013 07:50 PM
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trish6hundred Offline

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Machine: Resmed S9 AutoSet for Her
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Mask Make & Model: Respironics Wisp
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CPAP Pressure: 10 - 7-20 Cm H2O
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Other Comments: I started CPAP in 2008. Totally blind since birth.

Sex: Female
Location: Missouri, USA

Post: #7
RE: Sleeping with someone who uses CPAP
Hi pgw78,
My husband has not had any problems with my CPAP machine. Sometimes he will tell me if I'm having problems with mask leaks, but I just fix whatever's ailing it and go on and we both go back to sleep.

trish6hundred
07-18-2013 08:09 PM
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iSnooze Offline
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Machine: Respironics PR System One C-Flex+
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Other Comments: also use a Comfort Gel Full Mask by Respironics

Sex: Female
Location: Indiana

Post: #8
RE: Sleeping with someone who uses CPAP
(07-18-2013 07:46 PM)IloveZ Wrote:  My husband says the machine et all is much quieter than my snoring pre-PAP

Ditto. My snoring would have challenged an airstrip. My hubby says the machine is much quieter. He'll admit that my F-16 Fighter Gear as he calls it is not an aphrodisiac but it's not designed to be.

Since I'm married and he's stuck with me I didn't worry about the looks. That doesn't help you as a single person but you do need to communicate with any future partner what is going on if you are actually going to sleep in the same bed. Sleep apnea is a medical condition. Treat it as such and don't let the fear that your partner will dump you stop you from using your cpap.

Just my opinion. You are welcome to it Grin (or you could ignore it)
07-18-2013 08:30 PM
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Paptillian Offline

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Machine: S9 AutoSet
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Mask Make & Model: Swift FX
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CPAP Software: ResScan SleepyHead

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Sex: Male
Location: Pennsylvania, USA

Post: #9
RE: Sleeping with someone who uses CPAP
My wife and I haven't been married a full year yet, but I was diagnosed so here I am using CPAP as a "newlywed." It's not what either of us envisioned or dreamed of and I carry some guilt for it. She doesn't deserve this. When she sees me with the mask and gets sad / worried for me, it takes an emotional toll on me. When I tried to hold her in bed and realized she was getting blasted with cold air, that that was our new reality, it sucked. Not gonna lie.

Now having said that, one has to come to the realization that being on the mask is hardly the worst thing that can happen. People are dealt much more difficult cards and there are bigger challenges in life. She understands that too... and we both know that CPAP will make us happier in other ways by improving my energy and maintaining my health. Also, I dont snore anymore which she appreciates. It's still new and still a challenge but we're coming to terms with it.

I suspect that if a person cares about you enough, the mask doesn't matter. It's a superficial thing to get hung up on. Just maybe don't open the discussion on a first date Wink

The noise has not been a problem for us because there really isn't much. The machine is exceptionally quiet for what it does. My particular mask isn't noisy unless something is obstructing the vent holes.

Now the tubing is a huge pain in the @$$, but only for me. It doesn't affect her.
07-18-2013 08:49 PM
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PaulaO2 Offline
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Posts: 5,995
Joined: Feb 2012

Machine: S9 Autoset
Mask Type: Nasal pillows
Mask Make & Model: Nuance (non-pro)
Humidifier: H5i
CPAP Pressure: 14-20
CPAP Software: SleepyHead

Other Comments: Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome

Sex: Undisclosed
Location: western NC, USA

Post: #10
RE: Sleeping with someone who uses CPAP
(07-18-2013 07:46 PM)IloveZ Wrote:  My husband says the machine et all is much quieter than my snoring pre-PAP

Oh heck yeah! I've heard that from several folks. I stay with my bro up in NJ and he said they used to dread me coming over 'cause I'd wake the entire house. Now he doesn't mind at all.

Once when I was up there, my dog ate my mask as a sign of protest or something. My brother offered to drive the 24hr round trip to go to my house and get my extra! But we managed with duct tape and super glue while waiting for the shipment.

PaulaO2
Apnea Board Moderator
www.ApneaBoard.com


Breathe deeply and count to zen.

INFORMATION ON APNEA BOARD FORUMS OR ON APNEABOARD.COM SHOULD NOT BE CONSIDERED AS MEDICAL ADVICE. ALWAYS SEEK THE ADVICE OF A PHYSICIAN BEFORE SEEKING TREATMENT FOR MEDICAL CONDITIONS, INCLUDING SLEEP APNEA. INFORMATION POSTED ON THE APNEA BOARD WEB SITE AND FORUMS ARE PERSONAL OPINION ONLY AND NOT NECESSARILY A STATEMENT OF FACT.
07-18-2013 09:28 PM
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