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Parents, relatives, friends, etc.. who treat others like aliens for using CPAP - Printable Version

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RE: Parents, relatives, friends, etc.. who treat others like aliens for using CPAP - Sleeprider - 05-15-2019

Ever hear your parents snoring at night? If so, maybe their curiosity is because one or both of them also could use the therapy. Many people are genuinely interested, but have a funny way of asking. Often a person that might consider the therapy valuable will approach the subject sarcastically because they don't want to be perceived as weak or in need of a medical device. This may or may not be the case, but I'd be surprised if both parents of someone that needs CPAP are not themselves affected. Don't be defensive, sell it so they get the help they need.

Denial is the first step. Making fun or sarcastic comments towards someone else that uses cpap is the second. The third is to actually recognize that it might help and try to learn more. Acting on the problem can take a long time to come around.


RE: Parents, relatives, friends, etc.. who treat others like aliens for using CPAP - Dormeo - 05-15-2019

The family dynamics sound complicated! I’m curious: have you ever sat your parents down to tell them the symptoms you were experiencing, the damage to your health you would risk if you left your apnea untreated, and what it’s been like for you as you got used to the machine? Have they seen you using the machine and your mask?

Maybe you just don’t want to get into it all with them. I would completely understand that; it was my general way of dealing with my own parents. But if you felt you could, it might help them calm down about this and treat it more like your getting eyeglasses to treat far-sightedness than some exotic topic for chatter with other people.


RE: Parents, relatives, friends, etc.. who treat others like aliens for using CPAP - ardenum - 05-16-2019

(05-15-2019, 04:53 PM)Sleeprider Wrote: Ever hear your parents snoring at night? If so, maybe their curiosity is because one or both of them also could use the therapy. Many people are genuinely interested, but have a funny way of asking.  Often a person that might consider the therapy valuable will approach the subject sarcastically because they don't want to be perceived as weak or in need of a medical device.  This may or may not be the case, but I'd be surprised if both parents of someone that needs CPAP are not themselves affected.  Don't be defensive, sell it so they get the help they need.  

Denial is the first step. Making fun or sarcastic comments towards someone else that uses cpap is the second.  The third is to actually recognize that it might help and try to learn more.  Acting on the problem can take a long time to come around.

My first reaction was very much defensive when I heard that, but Sleepriders comment holds truth in it. They just might need it themselves. No harm talking to them about it.


RE: Parents, relatives, friends, etc.. who treat others like aliens for using CPAP - sheepless - 05-16-2019

two topics near and dear to older people are their children and what ails themselves and everybody else. if there's a mean spiritedness about it, it'd be up to you to set them straight (whether they respond the way you want is another question) or avoid the subject. if it's mean spirited, there are probably other issues more important than cpap that you hear / argue about if it's not mean but simply tactless, it'd still be up to you to set them straight (diplomatically, with a polite but firm description of your boundaries). there's no shame in cpap or any other health care. in fact, getting treatment is a very positive thing so while the parents' lack of understanding is disappointing, it's up to you to let it bother you or not.


RE: Parents, relatives, friends, etc.. who treat others like aliens for using CPAP - Mosquitobait - 05-17-2019

I had to be blunt with my mother and tell her not to share my medical issues with anybody without my permission. I told her that if she did it again, I would no longer keep her informed. Since then, she asks me - it's pretty hard for the neighbors to ignore that I'm using a walker, so had no problem with her sharing my trials and tribulations resulting from my fall. But she asked first.


RE: Parents, relatives, friends, etc.. who treat others like aliens for using CPAP - Mosquitobait - 05-17-2019

I had to be blunt with my mother and tell her not to share my medical issues with anybody without my permission. I told her that if she did it again, I would no longer keep her informed. Since then, she asks me - it's pretty hard for the neighbors to ignore that I'm using a walker, so had no problem with her sharing my trials and tribulations resulting from my fall. But she asked first.